Victor hates my favorite joke:
What's brown and sticky?
A stick!
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.
Whew.
(Wipe tears from eyes.)
God, I love that joke.
First with a joke was LeeAnn, then Da Goddess, then Victor, then Daniel, then Susie.
I have another one:
A dog walks into a bar and orders a beer. "Get lost, mutt," growls the bartender.
The dog slinks away, tail between his legs, but the next day he comes back. Hoping up on the stool, he asks for a beer.
"What did I tell you yesterday?" says the bartender. "I hate dogs! Get outta my bar!"
The dog leaves, but shows up again the next afternoon, goes right up to the bar and asks for a beer.
The bartender is enraged. "You sonofabitch*! How many times do I have to tell you--stay the heck out of here!" And with that, he raises a pistol and BANG shoots the dog. The dog whimpers and limps away.
Years go by.
One day the dog, a little grey in the muzzle, still with a bit of a limp, walks slowly through the bar doors.
"YOU!" shouts the bartender. "What are YOU doing here!?"
The dog says "I'm lookin' for the man who shot my paw."
*Technically not an obscenity in this case. Remember, he is a dog.
Dang, you beat me to it. The stick joke was going to be my next shot. I've loved it ever since my nephew called and woke me up at 3AM one night to tell it to me.
My favorite when I was little was "Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?.... It was DEAD!"
Dead monkeys are very big on the elementary school comedy circuit, trust me.